We had lunch, where we discussed what would need to be discussed, and then had a a quiet pensive ride home to pick up the children. More tears as I kicked up my gigantic and painful swollen feet on the back seat.
My mom urged us to talk alone, so we prayed and talked alone.
Was there value in prolonging Baby's life? Who is to say whose life to preserve: mine or Baby's? How do we leave time for God's healing? How could we decide when the likelihood of my health worsening was unquantifiable? Shouldn't we allow God to take Baby away in His timing?
Our pastors kindly agreed to meet with us for counsel. Derrick suggested we meet in person, so we drove over to church. I prayed for our pastors -- if I were them, I would definitely not know what to say, especially with such little preparation or notice. I came away from our meeting even more appreciative and esteeming of our dear pastors.
We explained the updates, and they agreed that this was a gray area: whether to deliver now or later. But that it did not make sense to gamble 2 lives when it was pretty sure that 1 was fatal. They each shared that they would save their wife, deliver now, and that their conscience would be clear to do that. Further, Christians have a different confidence in God's healing (not promised in Scripture) vs. a confidence in our salvation (promised in Scripture). They then prayed for us, and I felt a lightness to our decision-making.
No comments:
Post a Comment