I have avoided purchasing or bringing out anything for Baby, declined kind gifts for Baby from friends, etc... for fear of having to put it away again.
So when Derrick asked when we will begin preparing our home for Baby (like moving older boys into one room, readying the nursery), I panicked at the thought of:
opening our hearts to potential disappointment once more
and
unpacking Elias' things, things that were for Elias.
Instead of {a normal} excited anticipation in setting up our home/nursery, I felt painfully overwhelmed and incapacitated.
....
By God's grace, we approach the third trimester in a month. I know we cannot wait forever, and I should be faithful to steward what we know to be a healthy child in our care.
....
After a brief mention of the above, my friend swiftly offered her help and company to do this together. Not just light-hearted, or business-like company, but company that willingly entered into the onerous places of my grief and sorrow. Even 1 year later.
She offered to face hard memories and cry with me as I brought out baby things.
As well as to shop for baby items, pick up items for me if that is too difficult, anything, and that she didn't
have to be the person to do these things with me.
She offered things I did not know to request.
I was utterly moved. I rarely cry about Elias anymore but I did, then.
....
Bereavement is lonely and confusing.
One of the greatest gifts you can give to your grieving friend is to not be frightened by her mourning & sorrow, and to not shush her into silence. Those kinds of friends are scarce.
....
Thank You and you.
Thankful you have such a thoughtful friend in your life to walk with you! ❤️ you Janette!
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